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Working moms expo

Inspiration, Lifestyle, Slider

Do you struggle to get your kids to listen to you? – Guest Post

August 15, 2016

We all do it… we make idle threats in the grocery store to get the kids out of the sweets aisles and through checkout. But do you often find yourself falling into the trap of threatening without real consequence? Do you struggle to get your kids to listen to you? If you do, this article is for you.

My husband and I often feel that we are flying by the seat of our pants with our two kids – born seventeen months apart and both with the most wonderful, strong personalities you can imagine. So we ask for advice as much as we can. We have recently been through some excellent parenting workshops at our eldest son’s school.

A key takeaway from our recent parenting course is the following: “Punishment is the result of an absence of discipline”. So, if punishment is the “”timeout” or “naughty chair”, then what is discipline? It’s simple: following through.

I have often made idle threats. Unintentional, well-meaning, idle threats… “Put that back or we are leaving the shop now”, “Sit nicely in the trolley or you won’t get that sweet I promised you”. You can’t really blame me… trying to complete a shop with personality filled two- and three-year-old boys is no easy feat. Sometimes you will do just about anything to get what you need to get done, done. Preferably without sequential melt-downs. But, often, we choose the easiest route in the moment and sacrifice the longer term benefits of children who respect what their parents say and know where they stand.

The other day, I tried the follow-through approach: We were on the way to the park – My eldest son on his trike and my youngest son on his push bike, as excited as could be for the slides and swings that lay ahead. Unfortunately, my eldest started heading the wrong way – pushing the boundaries – down a dangerous hill with traffic at the bottom. I asked him to turn around. Nothing. I then told him that if he didn’t turn around we were going home – it was too dangerous. Unfortunately, he didn’t listen. I had to physically turn him around and push him back down the road we had come up, while carrying my youngest and his black push bike back home kicking and screaming (my son, not the bike!) in my arms. Our neighbours and their visitors gawked at the scene we made. I kept cool. Unmoved by the cacophony of sound that my boys can produce. My eldest son pleaded and begged, promising me he would listen. But it was too late. I had made a commitment and I was following through, come what may.

Well, once the hullabaloo had calmed down, do you know that I had the most relaxed and compliant afternoon from those boys? They had a lovely play together, came and sat down for dinner and ate it all up. Now, they are each tucked up in their beds and I have a moment to write this before I make dinner. What a difference! I’m committing to keep following through…

Now, we would love to hear from you… do you manage to follow through with your kids?  Do you have an awesome new way you’ve discovered to get your kids to listen to you? The truth is that we’re all in this together and your comments could help thousands of mums around the world to discover new ways to get their kids to listen to them and, more importantly, realize that they are not alone in the challenges they face…

If you found this article helpful, we would be honoured if you would share it with your friends via email or social media, sign up for the Working Mothers Expo VIP Waiting List and book your diaries for an event you will not want to miss

See you soon!

The Working Mothers Expo, brought to you in partnership with MiWay Life, brings together everything working mothers need under one roof. 4-6 November 2016. Sandton Convention Centre. Meet our MCs, Elana Afrika and Claire Mawisa, at the Speakers Corner.

Join our VIP Waiting List

If you would like to inquire about sponsoring or exhibiting at the event, please email us and we will send you all the details you need.

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Entreprenuerial moms, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Slider

Have you ever been on a date with your Son or Daughter?

June 7, 2016

Once I drove past my neighbour’s driveway as she was standing by her car in an evening dress, tying her six-year-old son’s tie. She was going on a date with her son, just the two of them. It was absolutely beautiful to see.

Have you ever been on a date with your son or daughter?

Working parenthood is a juggle. We need to acknowledge this and find a rhythm that helps us find a special moment with each of our children every day. “Go on a date with your firstborn child when your second arrives” is advice the headmistress of our son’s nursery school gives: “Your bringing that baby home is like your husband coming home one night saying, ‘Hi Honey! Look at my new wife! I’ve brought her home to join our family!’ expecting you to love her. If you can find the time to do special activities separately with each of your children this will smooth over most of the challenging situations life throws at you.”

It is also important to focus on behavior rather than on the child. Saying “yes” more often than “no” can turn a situation around. If you are consistently giving your children a negative response, saying “no” for each and every action they take, they will eventually stop responding. However, a positive take on a situation can redirect a child very effectively, with minimal stress on you and them. Try to praise them when they do things right and play down the things they get wrong. In general, children will tend to do whatever gets them attention – negative or positive.

What would she say to a new parent who is leaving through the Honeybee gate for work, his or her little one left in the nursery for the first time? Her tone, as expected, is kind but with a depth of wisdom only achievable through years of working with families: “I know this is hard. I know you are feeling guilty. But please, don’t. You are giving your kids a gift by bringing them to a wonderful school. Your children will learn and grow and thrive by being around other kids. Only, when you are with them, please make a point to try and take them on a date just you and them… and make it special.”

Now, we would love to hear from you… have you ever been on a date with your son or daughter?  Do you have some awesome suggestions on what to do to connect better with your kids? The truth is that we’re all in this together and your comments could help thousands of mums around the world to discover new ways to connect with their kids and, more importantly, realize that they are not alone in the challenges they face…

If you found this article helpful, we would be honoured if you would share it with your friends via email or social media, sign up for the Working Mothers Expo VIP Waiting List and book your diaries for an event you will not want to miss

See you soon!

The Working Mothers Expo, brought to you in partnership with MiWay Life, brings together everything a working mother needs under one roof on 4-6 November at the Sandton Convention Centre.  Take a step back from your hectic schedule, make some time to reflect, hear an inspiring speaker, indulge in some retail therapy and connect with other working mothers. We would like to create some dedicated time in your schedule that is all about you.

It’s time to take a moment. Join our VIP Waiting List

If you would like to inquire about sponsoring or exhibiting at the event, please email us and we will send you all the details you need.

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Article and image by Janice Windt: Blogger and founder of The Working Mothers Expo

 

Health, Inspiration, Lifestyle, Slider

3 Ways to Create Me Time in Your Day

April 12, 2016

 

Somewhere in the far reaches of my memory I can recall the concept of Me time: A moment that involved me, a book and a cup of chamomile tea on the two-seater couch that just fitted in my tiny first apartment…  A breeze would gently blow the sweet sound of children’s voices in through the open window.  I would lie peacefully, my knees over the couch armrest, dreaming of the day when I would be married with children of my own…

Today, Me time is the three minutes I get on the loo to check Facebook before one of my sons bursts through the door to see what I am up to.  It’s my drive to work – a luxury many stay-at-home mums would give anything to have – even once a week.  Me time is the thirty minutes I get here and there when I just leave everything – dishes, dirty clothes, toys strewn into every nook and cranny.  Sometimes I just look at it all and say “no, not right now” and I escape to my writing.  Sometimes, me time is a coffee, uninterrupted, during work hours.  That is a dream too – I know that and I appreciate every creamy sip.

So, what can you do, amidst the chaos that is your schedule, to create more Me time in your day? We have some suggestions for you below but we would really love to hear yours in the comments… because the truth is that we are all in this together:

  1. Spend some time thinking about what gives you joy. What is it that gives you that moment of exhale from everything else in your life that can sometimes all add up to feel like a never-ending focus on ‘work’? For me, it is swimming. When I am in the water, I forget everything around me and just breathe. It is a little piece of heaven in a weightless space that is just for me.
  2. Identify specific things you could outsource to some-one else in order to free up some time for you to get in that me time? I’ve recently outsourced the school drop-off to my husband so that I can race off the the gym and jump into the pool for twenty minutes before I start my work day… aaaaahhhhhh
  3. Give yourself permission and just go do what you love. It may not feel like it but, believe me, the time you sneak away from family and friends to spend on yourself will be paid back to them with dividends when a happier, healthier, more relaxed mom returns home to them after her Me-time

Now, we would love to hear from you… what do you do for Me time?  Do you ever get any at all? What do you do with the three minutes you have on the loo? We’re all in this together and your comments could help thousands of mums around the world find their own space to take the time they need…

If you found this article helpful, we would be honoured if you would share it with your friends via email or social media, sign up for the Working Mothers Expo VIP Waiting List and book your diaries for an event you will not want to miss.

See you soon!

The Working Mothers Expo, brought to you in partnership with MiWay Life, brings together everything a working mother needs under one roof.  Take a step back from your hectic schedule, make some time to reflect, hear an inspiring speaker, indulge in some retail therapy and connect with other working mothers. We would like to create some dedicated time in your schedule that is all about you.

It’s time to take a moment. Join our VIP Waiting List

If you would like to inquire about sponsoring or exhibiting at the event, please email us and we will send you all the details you need.

 

(The credit for this article belongs to Janice Windt, blogger and founder of the Working Moms Expo)

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